Tying the Knot in a Meaningful and Memorable Way (Without Losing Our Savings or Sanity)

Sunday, March 9, 2008

Don't Want to Sully the Appearance

Matt and I are busy finishing up the invitations. By "finishing up," I mean that we are writing personalized messages to our guests. The more I write, the more right it feels. I'm starting to wonder, "Why in the world isn't it customary to write personalized messages on wedding invitations?"

I mean, which holiday cards do you prefer? In my book, on a scale from 1-10, the 1 cards are those that have a generic, pre-printed message with a signature from the sender. A 5 is usually the one-size-fits-all letter. Bonus points (like up to a 6) if the letter is witty, and maybe 7 if it includes a photo. But the best cards are those that have a personalized message written to me.

We all want to feel valued, loved, and appreciated, and nothing says "I value, love, and appreciate you" like a hand-written note. When we invite others to our wedding, we are often asking them to trek hundreds of miles, spend hundreds of dollars on a plane ticket/rental car/hotel, and perhaps take a day off work. It seems like a little note of pre-appreciation is in order.

I don't mean this as an attack against generic invitation senders. I'm genuinely asking, "Why is it more customary not to write anything personal on invitations?" Is it because guests lists are usually very long and it would take too much time? Is it because invitations are often very beautiful and you don't want to sully the appearance?

Any comments with your speculations would be greatly appreciated!


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3 comments:

Ktina said...

I NEVER send out non-personalized Holiday cards....for a number of reasons. On the sender's end, it's a waste of your stamp. For the receiver, I would feel slighted to receive a generic card from a friend - I'd almost rather not get a card at all!
I view cards like yearbook messages; you want to say something that is just for the individual. An inside joke, referencing something you did that year. Otherwise, you'd have a yearbook (or group of cards) that is filled with fluff, "Hope you have a great summer! KIT!" Drives me crazy.
Yeah, I know I'm crazy for analyzing it this deeply - that's why I'm glad you did it first :)

Carrie said...

Regarding the wedding invitations, it's probably predominantly a time thing. Plus, there is something attractive about the crispness of a traditional wedding invitation to some of us. :) Good for you with your creativity, and your personal touch is admirable. You have always been unique, Sara!

megan said...

i'm a HUGE, HUGE fan of compromises (life would be one big mess if people didn't). So, for my mix of personalization AND aesthetically pleasing looks, i'm going to write a personal message on my save-the-date postcards, which are a reprint of a fabulous vintage pic from my hometown.

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