Tying the Knot in a Meaningful and Memorable Way (Without Losing Our Savings or Sanity)

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

A Plug for Practical Rings

Photo courtesy of Kate Szabone on Etsy

I opted for a very practical ring (read: a thinner band with a 2mm synthetic sapphire bezel) for a variety of reasons:
  1. I've never been a big jewelry wearer, so I wanted my ring to feel as inconspicuous as possible to make the transition from never wearing a ring to always wearing a ring easier.
  2. I never want to take my ring off. If I had to take it on and off for a variety of purposes (showering, sleeping, doing dishes, gardening, etc.), I would be more likely to lose it or prefer leaving it off.
  3. I don't want to worry about cutting myself or a baby or snagging something important.
  4. I want to be able to wear my ring while traveling in a developing nation without feeling like I'm flaunting America's excessive material wealth.
Sometimes I feel a little like a hippy or someone who is flat-out broke when I compare my ring to other women in professional situations. When I feel insecure about it, I try to remind myself that I intentionally chose the ring I'm wearing. It reflects who I am and what kind of life I lead. It's funny how easy it is to feel insecure about being different in a culture that values conformity.

It's up to each of us to make choices that reflect our deepest, authentic selves without feeling pressured by what others think we should or ought to do (which also means, if you want a big ring, don't let me pressure you otherwise!).

(For those of you who also prefer smaller, practical rings, I offer you this link to Kate's amazing store!)


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15 comments:

Caitlin T. said...

kate made my wedding rings. her work is amazing!

http://www.etsy.com/view_transaction.php?transaction_id=9673371

Michelle Neuman said...

Love this post! Her work is amazing. I don't think it's price that is important, it is having a ring that is special to you. Thank you for this plug!

Anonymous said...

I love that this woman lives in Whitby! Go Canada! I have attempted to convince my boyfriend that he should not be buying me a super expensive or fancy ring but he is insisting on spending at least $1000. I thought he was spending that much because he thought I "needed" that, but after an argument I now know he is doing it for him (pride I guess?). Strange, seeing as he isn't the one who will be wearing it!

Color Me Green said...

i do love kate's rings!

Lili said...

I know what you mean. While my ring was definitely closer to the traditional, I used my uncle's diamond and replaced the side diamonds with aquamarines (my birthstone). It probably cut well over $1000 off the price (I don't know for sure, as we never even considered shopping for a diamond), and it's far more personal and meaningful. Now if only we can find something like that for the fiance!

Hanna said...

We went with Sarah Perlis, who was wonderful! I was lucky enough to have a stone from my partner's family, and she worked with us to create something practical, beautiful, and snag-free! She also uses recycled metals and conflict-free stones. Highly recommend!

http://shop.sarahperlis.com/collections/wedding

Also, to Anonymous, engagement rings can be a status symbol for some men. My sister's engagement ring had a beautiful, small, perfect stone. Her husband is a pretty sensible person, but he said that when he sees some of their friends' engagement rings, his penis feels small. :D

Melisande said...

I've gone around and around this issue with my bf/soon to be fiance (i use the terms interchangeably). He told me at one point that he was set to pay $5k for a ring. I told him absolutely not, and told him that i would feel uncomfortable in anything over $1k (which is still high). I keep forwarding him links to websites like this, so that he can see that there are amazing rings out there that don't require you to shell over big bucks and that can be just as special.

Diana said...

I love my ring which is, compared to a lot of others, a modest 1/2 karat. However, had I thought about it more in depth before our engagement (and seen the beautiful options out there for non-traditional engagement/wedding rings) I most definitely would have opted for a cheaper and practical option. I too, am trying to pull off a wedding for under 2k, so thinking about that now, and realizing that my engagement ring could have paid for our entire wedding and part of the honeymoon, would have definitely thought twice before going the traditional route. Hopefully others see the options out there and consider them.

Lauren said...

My fiance and I have just (ie. last night!) started looking for our rings on Etsy. Before we started, though, we made a "list" of the things we wanted, and the things we didn't want - a list which looked very similar to yours, Sara! We want rings that we can "live" with - we don't want to be taking them on or off, or worrying about whether we should be wearing them when we're overseas.

That said, while we're spending a bit of time looking for "practical" rings, the rings are a minor issue for us - the important part is the commitment they represent.

zoliepup said...

I think I might have mentioned our wedding rings from Robandlean on etsy. They were inexpensive and are wood and titanium. Very understated but beautiful, and symbolic of us.

ChendaBride said...

The first thing that people who know me say about my ring is that it really suits me. I love that. Of course, I chose it myself. But I'm wearing this for the rest of my life so I felt it was important that I participated in the decision. We all get to marriage from different paths. I don't understand why we're all supposed to be sporting these big ubiquitous rocks.

Katie said...

My boyfriend and I have similar standards for what we are looking for... I love this etsy shop - we've found my boyfriends ring on there too - Thank god for alternative wedding rings.

Ellie said...

I love practical gemstone rings like the ones by Turtle Love Committee. I really wanted a gemstone ring that wasn't too expensive, because I was afraid of losing it. We ultimately compromised, because my fiance wanted to go with a diamond so we got it made out of a cheaper metal (palladium) and used a family stone that is fairly small (.35 carats) and he custom designed the setting so that it has a bezel setting and doesn't scratch or snag anything. Oh, plus its insured against pretty much anything that could happen to it - so I'm less worried about losing it.
I didn't expect to want to wear it all the time but I love it so much that I hate to take it off! That being said, the only people whose rings I'm jealous of are people with gemstone rings...

ms. punk rock said...

i think Kate's work is absolutely amazing. thank you for sharing!

A-L, from An Honorable Estate said...

I frequent a jewelry forum and on there I'm like a frugal, super-utility conscious person. But over here I'm one of those people who's going to have a decently sized rock on my finger. It will be a sapphire, which took a little convincing on my part for my boyfriend to go for, but there will be diamonds on the band as well. But we're planning on bezeling, so at least it will be practical!

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