Tying the Knot in a Meaningful and Memorable Way (Without Losing Our Savings or Sanity)

Monday, April 30, 2012

The Art of Perpetual Compromise

For Matt and me, there was a lot of negotiation and compromise involved with planning our wedding. For example, we wanted to stand in front of the lake to get married, but there was literally no space. We could have cleared the whole area of the trees and bushes that stood in our way, but that would have conflicted with our desire to express our eco-friendly values. 

Matt suggested that we stand on top of one of the picnic tables to tie the knot. I hated that idea (we were already doing everything so unconventionally!). I tried to logically point out that if we stood on one of the picnic tables to get married, we wouldn't have enough space for everyone to sit. He replied logically, "Well, then we can have people sit at the table we're standing on." 


That kind of back and forth ("I think we should do it this way" and "Well, I think we should do it this way.") didn't stop once we had the marriage certificate in hand. Matt and I have to make all sorts of joint decisions as we craft a life together. 

Now we're entering into the phase of building a house together [insert ominous music]. It's exciting, of course, but it's also nerve-wracking thinking about all the negotiation and compromise that's going to take place so that our new house reflects both of us. First point of contention: the color of our counters. We've agreed to birch cabinets, but now we disagree about the color of the countertops. Our options are white, black, or gray.

Oy vey!

Photo republished via Remodelista

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1 comment:

Anonymous said...

When my husband and I were planning our wedding we ran to the same issues as you. My fiance at the time wanted to get married in a small church. I wanted to get married in my church that I belonged too for 10+ years. Eventually, he realized how important getting married in my church was. When it came to the music for the wedding reception my husband wanted a band I wanted a DJ.

Him and I had those issues when planning our wedding. Since, my husband works a lot, I did a lot of the wedding planning. When my fiance came up with a silly idea, I had to make him understand why the idea just wouldn't work. He had several silly ideas... like wearing a bright blue suit!!

When he wanted a band for the wedding reception, it would have cost us too much money to hire one. So the only cheaper option for us was to hire a DJ. Having a DJ for our wedding fit into our budget.

Now, that we have been married for three weeks we've had to continue learning to compromise. Even though we have so much in common we do have our moments of disagreement. When we have our disagreements we always work to find middle ground.

Good luck with your new adventures and planning for your new home!! :)

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